


Lover Outtake: Alternate Chapter 7

by SassenachSwiftie



Category: Lover - Taylor Swift (Album), Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon, Taylor Swift (Musician)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:47:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27050680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SassenachSwiftie/pseuds/SassenachSwiftie
Summary: An alternate chapter of my fic, Lover
Relationships: Claire Beauchamp & Jamie Fraser, Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser
Comments: 5
Kudos: 20





	Lover Outtake: Alternate Chapter 7

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 7 was originally going to be "Me!" and chapter 8 was going to be "Afterglow" but everything was already hashed out in this chapter so weaving in the lyrics to Afterglow felt redundant and like Claire and Jamie couldn't get over it. I was really proud of how I managed to hit the emotional beats using such a catchy pop song though, so I'm posting this chapter for anyone who might be interested in a glimpse into my writing process.

Jamie’s heart was still aching a month after she left him. However, his pride kept him from reaching out to her. The truth is, he’d forgiven everything she’d done and everything she could do long before that day. For him, that was no choice. That was falling in love. He threw himself into his work on the farm and his family. Helping Jenny with meals, driving the children to various practices and scout meetings, helping Ian with the unending harvest September brought.

On this particular evening, Jamie found himself at his nephew Ian’s homecoming game. He tried to pay attention to the game, but he really couldn’t wrap his head around the complexities of American football. It was so stop-and-go--what exactly was a ‘down’? It reminded him of battle maps of the rising he’d seen in a history textbook when he was in high school in Scotland. Naturally, his thoughts drifted to Claire. As the cold September air wrapped around him, he felt it was fitting. He had been living in winter all month, she was his summer. He could have buttoned his jacket, but what was the point of feeling warm when his heart felt so cold? He didn’t even realize half time had started until he heard a high pitched teen shout “Strike the band up, one, two, three!”. Everything around him was bright and alive, he felt like an island, detached from his surroundings, drifting in the waves. He decided to get some snacks to distract himself. He hadn’t sat like this without a distraction all month. At least with Kitty’s soccer games he could focus on the game. Here, he needed a task to deter his restless mind. 

“I’m going to go get something to eat, anyone want anything?” he asked his family. A barrage of orders came at him from his nieces and nephews, and he recited them back, intentionally messing up their orders much to their amusement, before correcting himself and making his way up the bleachers.

It was on his way back down that he spotted an unmistakable mop of curly brown hair and almost dropped the snacks he just shelled out twelve American dollars for. _Sassenach_. His heartbeat immediately picked up to match the beat of the marching band. God, she was beautiful, but she looked so fragile there, cold and alone, head down, wearing a grey jacket that seemed to match the air around her. He wanted to wrap her up until he saw that beautiful spark light up her face again. Before he knew it he was beside her, “Claire?”

“Hi Jamie, fancy seeing you here!” He had no idea how to reply, it was as if he had gone mute. He just stared into those whiskey eyes that looked so full of sorrow. He almost started to reach out to her, forgetting the concessions he was holding. Luckily, she offered to help him carry them and before he knew it they were headed down the bleachers together.

When she agreed to sit with him his heart was soaring. If simply sitting next to her was all he could have for the rest of his life, it would be enough. _Let me keep you company always mo nighean donn._ They were actually able to talk and even flirt a bit as she tried to watch the game, but his eyes couldn’t leave her. He felt so comfortable with her, they just seemed to fit together effortlessly. She was so close he could smell her shampoo, something herbal that he couldn’t quite pin down. It wasn’t fruity or overpoweringly floral like some women he had met in his life--it suited her. Having her there, inches from her made him feel bold. He formulated a plan in his head to get her alone, he needed to be closer to her, but not with his entire family right there.

\----------

He had ended his bold, flirtatious exchange by winking to make it abundantly clear what he was asking her. She had seemed responsive. Her face lit up like it had so many times over the summer they shared. He was starting to sweat despite the chill in the air pacing underneath the away teams bleachers as he waited for her. How long should he wait? What if she wasn’t coming? What if she saw this opportunity to walk away again? _I never wanna see you walk away._

After what seemed like an eternity, she came to him. He heard her feet soft on the gravel, approaching him in the dark. He saw his opportunity, and met her, taking her in his arms as soon as he could, ready to take her mouth as he had imagined so many times in the past month. How many times had he imagined kissing her again? How many times had he tried to recreate their last night together, wishing he had committed every moment to memory, not knowing it could have been their last. None of that mattered now, his Sassanach had returned to his arms--but just like that, she was gone again running away--but he wouldn’t let her go this time. He pulled her back and set her straight. Poor, beautiful, broken, Claire collapsed before him. He sat with her, trying to calm and comfort her, when she could speak, she confessed her fears to him. 

“Claire, there now, what are you afraid of?”

She spoke softly, composed now but still on the verge of tears. “I don’t deserve you. After what I did… I know that I’m a handful and uh… I never think before I jump, and you’re the kind of guy… I man look at you, all the ladies want you. Why me? I’ve got so much baggage, trouble’s going to follow where I go. There’s a lot of cool chicks out there, you could be with anyone. Don’t you see I’m no good for you? Not to mention--”

“Claire, you’re rambling.”

“So I am” she blushed, turning her head down and looking up at him sheepishly.

“Have I no say in any of this? Because the truth is, well, the truth is I don’t see much truth in anything you just said. Don’t you see what we have? Claire, when you walked into my life you were like a rainbow with all of the colors. I ken you wouldn’t be here right now if you didn’t feel it too, am I correct?”

“I’m sorry, I know I tend to make it about me, but you’re right, what we have… it’s not like the others, it’s not like anything I’ve ever felt before. I don’t even know how to describe it. When you ran after me and called my name just now, it’s like I’m drawn to you, I wouldn’t know how to let you go if I tried. God, I _have_ tried.” She looked down, ashamed.

Jamie gently placed his thumb under her chin so she faced him again, smiling. “You certainly ken how to keep me on my toes. One thing’s for sure, you’ll never bore me, but you’re the only one of you. My only one, mo chride, my Sassenach, my Claire. I mean not to let you get away from me again. I promise that you’ll never find another like me.”

“Jamie, after all I did to you? I know that I went psycho, I never leave well enough alone sometimes. I’m so sorry Jamie. I truly don’t feel I’ll ever deserve you”

“Forgiven Claire. I can’t say I’m happy about what you did, but I understand why you did it. You’re here now and that’s all that matters. We’re together now. I’m under your spell whether you like it or not.” They were drawing in closer to one another now as apologies and declarations were made in the dark. 

“Mmm… spelling is fun” she said, able to return to the flirtatiousness that came so naturally when she was around Jamie. Their faces were inching closer together with each moment they shared under the bleachers.

“Claire, I would very much like to kiss you” he whispered, “May I?”

“Yes” came her breathless reply.

Instantly, their mouths were joined. Slowly, tentatively they reacquainted their lips before opening to each other fully. Tongues finding their way back between open lips, teeth finding their way to lower lips. All the pent-up passion of the last month culminated into one enduring kiss. 

Claire finally managed to pull away, realizing where they were. “Jamie,” she panted, slightly out of breath. “Take me home.”


End file.
